Pathological Story Telling
by Lune Mish
Summary: Alfred is a natural conversationalist that enjoys leaving behind stories of himself with every person he gets to know. Issue is some of the details may be exaggerated, factually incorrect, or up for interpretation. Yet Alfred himself knows every word to be true making it impossible to unravel his strings. Won't stop a gaming server and an obstinate Brit from trying though.


Alfred F. Jones spun stories as if they were going out of style.

He never knew when a thread would form or who it would connect him to.

It just happened whenever he opened his big goddamn mouth.

Creating a tangled mess on the outside and cob webs within.

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 **Guardian Union #General**

 **Aquil** _Today at 9:15am_

 **Hullo fellow heroes, demons, an cool wanderers of this earth ;3**

 **Aquil** _Today at 10:01am_

 **Aww I made such an amazing arrival but no ones here to see it :(**

 **Helllooooooooooo**

 **Anyone in the Voiddddd**

 **All by myselfffff dun want to be all by myselfff**

 **well this sucks**

 **Desperate times call for desperate measures owo**

 **Tea Fae**

 **Tea Fae Tea Fae Tea Fae**

 **Tea Fae** _Today at 10:05am_

 **Enough Twit**

 **This better be important or so help me I may actually throttle you.**

 **Aquil** _Today at 10:05am_

 **Geez someone woke up with their panties in a twist :P**

 **Tea Fae** _Today at 10:06am_

 **Anyone would if they were forced to see this after pulling an all nighter.**

 **Your use of emoticons is cancer.**

 **Feel Bad.**

 **Aquil** _Today at 10:08am_

 **UWU I was just OWO trying to say ;3 Hi! Didn't know cranky old people were allowed near vidya games**

 **Tea Fae** _Today at 10:08am_

 **I'll have you know brat that I am a level 50 mage.**

 **While you were busy learning how to walk I set hundreds of orcs on fire.**

 **Fuck you.**

 **Aquil** _Today at 10:09am_

 **O/O Wha but I only just met you oldie ... date number two better be at a cheesecake factory or we may have to break up**

 **Tea Fae** _Today at 10:09am_

...

 **Doitsu**

 **Aquil** _Today at 10:10am_

 **OWO**

 **Doitsu** _Today at 10:10am_

 **Mein Gott another one.**

 **Aquil** _Today at 10:10am_

 **Hewwo?**

 **Doitsu** **** _Today at 10:12am_

 **DON'T SPAM PICS**

 **DON'T SET ANYTHING ON FIRE**

 **AND DON'T PM TINDER PICS**

 **ARE WE CLEAR**

 **Aquil** _Today at 10:12am_

 **umm sure peachy +_+**

 **Doitsu** _Today at 10:13am_

 **As Admin I welcome you to the unofficial discord server of Archana Online.**

 **Normally I would educate you on the rules of this server, but I have work in two hours.**

 **I will do it later bye.**

 **Aquil** _Today at 10:15am_

 **Ummm thnx?**

 **Sounds horrible T-T**

 **Glaceon** _Today at 10:18am_

 **It is**

 **Shhh you saw nothing**

 **Aquil** _Today at 10:18am_

 **OWO !**

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Alfred sat back in his seat waiting for a response that never seemed to come.

He didn't expect much when first creating a new account for the server, but the responses given to him certainly piqued his interest. Especially that of the old guy calling himself tea something. Either the guy was some 12 year old attempting to pull off the stiff British man stereotype or he was an actual person who actually spoke like that in real life. Alfred didn't know which of these two options was more laugh worthy which made Tea an immediate target for the act of basic friending.

That is if he still had a chance.

Alfred continued to read over his previous responses while chewing on his lower lip. His laptop screen giving him a sickly blue glow as his eyes pored over every tiny detail. The emoticons were meant to soften his words. His lack of punctuation a sign of carelessness. Some shortened words here and there made for easy friends. He knew this beforehand and now was his time to make sure he followed through.

If he made a mistake he would remedy it with a few clicks of his mouse.

If he came off too strong he would rein himself in.

He just found himself another audience and refused to lose again.


End file.
